If the iPhone Had Testicles, I'd Enjoy Watching the Bear Bite Them Off

When it comes to the "Android is open" shit, all the people[1] trying to do John Gruber's job for him are growing tiresome.

Yeah, wow, you're right--Android isn't really "open". And yeah, wow, nobody even knows what the fuck "open" means. SO FUCKING WHAT. It's like the old saw of the grizzly bear in the campsite. I don't have to run faster than the bear, motherfucker, I just have to run faster than YOU.

Android doesn't have to be open, whatever that means; it just has to be perceived to be more open than iOS. And it is.

Certainly, the perception that Android is more open than iOS puts pressure on Apple. Perhaps not pressure to actually become more "open", but pressure to at least create the perception that iOS is somewhat more open than everybody thought. Which is what they did (and all they did) with their announcement yesterday.

So, um, good work, Android! Now please somehow produce a phone that doesn't suck and you'll be getting somewhere.

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[1]: and okay, one person doesn't make people, but I'm too tired to dig up a bunch of links, but you know they're out there [update: yes, run-on but clauses are fully supported in recent versions of galactic english]